


Never is Rare

by cassiel0uwho



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-31
Updated: 2014-05-31
Packaged: 2018-01-27 19:21:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,158
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1719746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cassiel0uwho/pseuds/cassiel0uwho
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>for wssumer- week two- penance</p>
    </blockquote>





	Never is Rare

**Author's Note:**

> for wssumer- week two- penance

Jemma's fingers trembled. She clasped her hands together in hopes that their trembling wouldn't be noticeable.

It had been a few weeks since Ward had been let off his leash. So to speak. Early on, Coulson and May discovered he didn't know much. She suspected the older agents had wanted to learn any available weakness of Hydra through him. The only one- they realized- that would have known something useful was Garrett. A dead end. Quinn mostly likely knew more at this point. Not like Jemma took note of all this. She stayed away from him. Regardless of where he was.

He was a different person. There was no point in filtering his words. No cover to keep up. His first attempt at it had resulted in a bloody nose given by Skye. He cleaned himself up that time. Despite both women's protests to have him off the Bus, Ward proved to be useful. He analyzed differently than Coulson or May/ Proving that he could be an asset. It made Jemma bitter, her stomach turn.

The first time Ward was allowed to actively assist on a case, he returned bloody. He had blocked Trip from a knife. Jemma was glad for Trip's medical training. It was the first time that Jemma left the lab willingly. No bribes from Skye, no threats from Coulson, no stares (and oddly comforting words) from May, no Trip carrying her to her bunk when she passed out. She simply fled her lab so that he could be stitched up. 

Jemma blamed it on the fact that she needed to call Fitz. There was a bit pf pride in her. No one called her in the lie. She did call Fitz around the same in his time zone; between meds and physical therapy where he wasn't as tired.

This time, Trip couldn't do anything. Jemma cursed his three broken fingers.

“Look we can wait till someone else gets here. They can dig the bullet out.” Trip explained.

They were the two who were left behind on the Bus. No one was allowed to stay by themselves any more. It was one of many of their new ground rules. Trip was alright company.

It was Skye who returned with Ward. The hacker still hated him, she just knew how to forgive. Trip immediately her out. Neither could deal with her comments. 

Jemma took a deep breath. It would be fine. It would all be fine.

“It wasn't through and through. I'd probably end up doing it any way. No point in delaying the inevitable.” Jemma announced, trying to breeze through it like she usually did.

Trip nodded as he took a seat behind her. Maybe to keep an eye out on Ward. “Alright, doc. Right behind ya if you need anything.”

“I know.” Jemma said and flashed a grateful smile at him.

She stared down at Ward. He was shirtless. A sight that Jemma was still accustomed to. How many times had she done this? Patched him up and sent him off. Most times she didn't question it. Only that was because she hadn't known any better.

“It's just my shoulder.” Ward's voice was quiet as if he was afraid of startling her.

“I know.” Jemma spat out. “Most aren't gentle when the remove the bullet. Damage more tissue and nerves, and leave fragments behind. They do more harm than good.”

Ward was completely quiet as she started to clean the dried blood away. Usually, her first step was to give a numbing agent. Cleaning wounds generally caused pain. Jemma just wasn't in a kind mood. If Trip noticed, he kept his mouth shut.

Her face was set as she worked. Cleaning and analyzing the damage. She wasn't trying to be rough, yet her touch wasn't gentle. He did flinch a few times and Jemma could tell by the stiffness in which he held himself that he was trying not to. She felt guilty. Just a little. Jemma wondered if the man he was before the Bus- before Hydra- was the man he could have been with out Garrett’s interference. What a different man he would have been Would he have truly caught her like he had promised? She sighed to herself. It was pointless, pointless thinking. It would get her no where. He had nearly killed hr and Fitz. There would be no forgiveness on her end.

Never was a strong word for Jemma. Not used often. She was a person of science. Words like never, words that suggested finality or a way out, were rarely used by her. There was generally a rule or exception.

“I'm sorry.” Ward spoke softly.

Jemma's hand dropped from his arm. “No.” Her voice is firm and steadier than she had expected. “No.” Jemma repeated, her voice rising. “You don't get to say your sorry. You don't get sorry!”

She can hear Trip stand up from his chair. He hasn't moved towards her so she doesn't glance back. 

“You don't get to be sorry, Ward!” Her voice wasn't as controlled. She was close to tears, and she was fairly certainly that she was close to screaming. “You were emotionally manipulated. I get that, but it doesn't forgive what you did. It will never make up for what you have done.”

“It was supposed to float.” He doesn't shout at her, his words were spoken carefully 

Jemma can feel Trip's hands on her shoulders. He might be speaking in her ear, but she doesn't listen.

“So, that's your plan? Act innocent? Is that why you have a bullet in your arm, so you can claim penance?”

“Jemma, I wouldn't...i wouldn't do something like that.”

“It's Simmons.” She virtually hissed. “You expect me to believe that? You promised to catch me. And then you threw Fitz and I off the Bus! You are perfectly capable of it. Don't you dare deny it. Fitz can't walk. He can barely even function because of you.”

She took a step to the side. Trip's hand dropped from her soldier.

“Do you want me to try and finish up?” He asked gently.

“No.” Jemma breathed her answer. “But you can go and talk to Skye.” She said with a nod to where she was watching.

Jemma waited for Trip to leave. 

“You can ask forgiveness, you can sacrifice yourself till you've killed yourself. I don't care, Ward. I will never forgive you for what you've done.”

“I know.” He sighed. “And I am sorry.”

She ignored him this time and focused on removing the bullet. He could say those words a million times, put himself in front of a gun too. It wouldn't make a difference. Twenty minutes later, she finished taping the bandage in place over the stitches.

“You're done, and as usual you know what to do.” Jemma said before tossing a sling and heading out of the lab.

“You alright?” Trip asked from the top of the stairs.

“Never better.”


End file.
